Saturday, December 03, 2005
its complicated
i think i din blog for quite some time.few events happen in my life of course.firstly,is about my family.i dun want to talk much about it cos it is not something to be proud of.sometimes,i just dun understand why she is not satisfied.everything also went well.graduated and then get a good job.got a car to drive here and there.even in uni times also got car.what more you want?now,want to own a house and car when you only work for less than a year.isnt that too ambitious?and you do not want to take out own money.want so much things in life but yet you are so stingy.you are jealous of me,aint you?what have i got compare to you?looks?nah..i am damn ugly,brains?u are definitely better than me.height?u are so much taller than me.love?you have all the love you want.i only got the love of my parents.haih...sometimes,i just dun understand.did you know i am jealous of you?and your presence makes me feel that i am nothing compare to you?did you know that?no,i dun think you will understand.all you know is money and i take all the things you want and the truth is you are the one doing that.blood is thicker than water.there is nothing i can do but to accept you as you are.exam coming soon,have to prepare .i wanna do well this sem.gtg now.seeya
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Sunday, November 13, 2005
Sunday, September 11, 2005
anything
i was kind of lucky i manage to find a few best frens who will be there for me and they really treat me over my expectations.thanks to all my best frens!i try my very best to be a good frquite some time din blog already.busy with assignment and project.plus eyes not that good so cant see the screen for too long.hehe...a lot of things happen but i dun think i can remember that much and write everything here.hmmm...let me think what to start first.erm...yea..went back to hometown for elder sis convo.really tiring as few days before that,i have continuous exam then rush here and there.then went yum cha at night ..with my exschool mates...my fren,soh nam going to go india soon to proceed her studies in medicine..so no matter how tired,i try my very best to go out instead resting at home.went to bed at 1 am..so damn tired.....but happy cos have along chat with my frens.yea..met carmen..she promoting ford cars..kind of shocked to see her..cant recognise her.she was wearing really tigh clothes with miniskirt and high heels...hehe...really sexy.she ask us to help her in the survey..so layan her a bit lah.by the time i went back,elder sis not back yet from convo night.whole day,i havent really see her face as by the time,i went home,she busy make up for convo night then i was busy going out to collect flowers for her and teman my mum to set her hair also..then by the time i at home,she out already with her bf.at night ,i went out and by the time she came back,i already asleep.she went to her uni early in the morning.she woke me up to ask me to help her with her tie...after her,daddy came to me with the same reason.aiyoh...i wanna sleep also cannot.then at 730..we depart from house.was really sleepy that time.by the time we reach there,i saw a lot of people holding flowers...the smile on those people.such a happy occasion.then finally ,i saw my elder sis.the students lining up to go inside the chancellor hall.i look at my elder sis.fuiyoh,she look really pretty except she a bit too skinny already...face also like getting longer.when i look at the suit she was wearing and that square hat,i wonder when will i wear that...still long way to go...hopefully can graduate on timelah.saw her other frens also...fairene...damn pretty girl,malene..look the same,khang mei...she so cute..so short...top student...haih..jealous only.hmm...was looking for jiun horng but cant see him.later,when the ceremony over,took lots of pics.my grandma came also with all my relative.my legs pain already wearing high heels.have to lah...i dun want to look shorter than my younger sis when take pic..hehe.then went lunch at restaurant tuck kee....two tables.my dad belanja...a lot of money.then rush back home and i try to look at my best as going to go chan sam lock studio to take family photo.was really happy but when i reach mlk,damn nervous when think of circuit exam but then luckily manage to pass .was quite sad when din do well in electromagnetic exam.must do well in final if not sure fail.same goes for ecp.....really scared.yea...something spoil my mood early in the morning yesterday.when i open my ym,my exschoolmate want to add me.of course i allow but then when i try to add her into my list,she denied.thinking she might click wrongly,so i try again but the same thing happen.haih...i also dun know why.as far as i remember,i din offend her but seriously,i am not bother also.if want to become my fren ,i welcome but if dun want,it is fine also.i dun give a damn !this implies especially to my exschoolmates.thats why i hardly keep in touch with certain people because they are not bother also to keep in touch with you so why bother about them?i notice those that went to overseas all also like that,maybe they think they have the chance to go overseas..hell of a great kua.and i hate those people who always expect me to message them only reply me.shows no initiative in keeping in touch with you.so when i am back to ipoh,i will go out with those people who keep in touch with me like irene teh,joanne leong,keng chui(seldom also),ivena,choon tyng .usually go out with my other frens...hehe...recently,spending a lot time with my ex supervisorlah..hehe.....as for my other exschoolmates such as those bunch of snobbish prefects,dun have anything to do with them also after i left school.includes my ex class monitor.she also part of those snobbish prefects gang.even my librarians pals,sok ling,suit yee,sze yeng,and even sye fei ,i hardly see them also.same goes to those last time close to me(i mean position in the class)...like hung jen,natalie chai,joo shin,mei kheang...all also din keep in touch.probably because they got their own frens.actually,i am going to be 20 soon and in those 20 years i go through,i have learn a lot especially in the aspect of frens.frens are not that important but of course one must have frens.if take your frens too seriously,you ended up hurting yourself cos according to miss joo shin ..this is what she said to me " you expect too much from your frens".if you become frens or treat that person as a fren,of course you be nice to her and hope she nice to youlah.takkan you treat her nice,and then she treat you badly,she still accept her as your frenmeh?if you do that,your acting skills is so damn great...pretender.but as time goes by,her words a bit true also.and i change my thinking,i have expection from those people that i consider best frens.en,no one is perfect and so is myself but to those people who dun treat me as a fren,i dun give a damn,ok.last time,i used to not forgive my frens that hurt me a lot especially those that cause me to cry but then i realise one must learn to forgive your frens..everyone also make mistake...same goes to me so must forgive .to me,family is very important.last time i never realise that and sometimes,i take my parents for granted but when i further my studies in mlk,i realise my parents is the one that truly love me .really miss them a lot.i used to be very naughty but right now,when i think of my parents getting old,i try my best to make them happy....getting late liao,i guess i stop now.got a lot of things to mention but time doesnt permit that..hehe..nitez!
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
only you
It has been a long time since i saw your face.Exactly two months i guess.I was happy when i hear your voice the other day.You sound happy and energetic.HAPPY BIRTHDAY!When i met you on wednesday,i couldnt believe my eyes ,in fact i hardly can recognise you.cut your hair,huh?i think you look cuter with your previous style.I just like to talk to you.Y ou are one of those people that can make me smile and laugh always and i feel really happy,secured and comfortable when i am with you.Then when we were watching movie inside the cinema,did you know that i was so scared whenever the horror scene appeard till i really want to hold you close ? i know you were scared too when you put your hand cover your eyes.Although i am scared,i dont have the guts hold your hand instead i just pretend not to be scared and hold tight my fist.i was really stunned when you hold my hand all of sudden and at that moment,i feel so happy..even my heart beat faster ,However,i understand you too well,after few minutes,you let go of my hand ,you will never explain anything and just as i have expected,all you do is keep silence.Do you know how much you hurt my feelings when you do that?soon after silence is in the air.we hardly talk and whenever my eyes stare at you,i saw you turned away.haih...
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Monday, July 11, 2005
you are the one
been busy nowadays.have to get ready for midterm.kind of happy today as i just receive my engineering maths mid term result.got 17/20.kind of oklah as i dun expect much.people like me are stupid so should satisfied compare to my elder sis who is so damn smart and good in her studies.no wonder she got first class honours when she graduate.me?i am such a nuisance in the family.no idea where all my confidence gone but one thing i realise i will never be better than her no matter how hard i try.thats why myconcept is stupid people like me will always remain stupid.haih...yea...looking forward to go back ipoh.hehehe...your birthday coming...so sorry i cant make it to celebrate with you but i will be back on 29 july.promise to call you and wish you happy birthday and looking forward to go out with you *wink wink*.hmm...but really have to study hard during the break.lots of stuff i dun understand...once again..stupid people like me is like that.last weekend,i almost waste my time doing nothing but sleeping and dreaming.haih....yea..dreaming about you.next week,my elder sis taking a flight to bintulu.i wish her all the best and may she find happiness working there.yay~i got car to use when back to ipoh.must practise my driving well so that i can go here and there.hmm...really miss you.and this break,seriously have to divide my time well as i need to study then go out with you and my mum ask me to teach my younger sis in her studies.must know which is my priority.sorrylah,as for now,you are definitely not my first priority.hahaha...of course studies first and then my younger sis and you are the last i guess...hehehe....aiks...in library database centre now so have to ciaoz...
Friday, July 01, 2005
about him...
nowadays,i have been thinking a lot about you.probably because i miss you a lot.oh yea...thanks for the heart pendant.indeed,i like it very much.and really appreciate for your calls and sms .to be honest,i really miss those times we spend together,though it is only for one month plus.at first,my impression of you wasnt that good.i dun really like you in fact,probably because you are superior than me plus the way you talk also kind of selfish type.but deep inside ,i think you look cute.i hate it when you ask me to do this and that and i show some kind of annoying face.you din talk much to me at first probably cos i am new kua.according to you,i wasnt that friendly.i was kind of disappointed cos you never ask me to join you for lunch.each time when it is time for lunch,i will look at you and my heart was hoping you will ask me to join you but you didnt so i went lunch with my dad and sometimes with hung.each time you din come to work,i will ask around why you werent there.i guess we were close from the dayi told you i wanna quit my job.that was the time you actually talk to me more than 15 minutes.i cant believe you actually ask me not to resign.deep inside ,i was happy to hear you say that but i have to as i have to go back mmu soon.i was kind of touch when you mention that all this while,you have been really "sayang " me....trying not to give me a lot of job.when he said that only i realise how good you have been to me.i was kind of hot tempered and each time you ask me to do something,i sort of give some rude remarks to you....sort of bully you..especially you told me your age..hehehe..but you never keep in the heart and instead you take it easy.actually,i want to tell you a lot of things...such as i have use your password..erm..i din stole your password,you give it to me once and i remember it..hehe...i have help you to release all the invoice which need to print the report.i have help you also.i think we sort of get close when we work together on my last sunday.haha...just the two of us.i was really happy when i found out that you were working on sunday with me.was really nice of you to offer to buy breakfast for me.and you have teach me a lot of things that day too .we talk a lot and i really got to know you better that time.you told me your bad experience and i really pity you.you share your experience with me and i share mine too.oh yea...i like your hp....you use your hp to play some song and sing to me also...hehe...i like that when you sing to me and let me use your hp.i feel that i am close to you.hahaha...you even left your hp with me when you go toilet...really trust me that much woh.there is one promoter told us we look like couple...go everywhere together and talk the whole day.hehehe....at last,you ask me to go lunch with you... :) really happy that day.since that day,we have been close..went lunch together everyday.and we went out for movie too.really happy that day and thanks a lot for "belanja" me.i am really happy to know you and i am looking forward to go back ipoh and meet you again. i hope you are doing well there.i understand what you have been through and i know you need some time to heal from those bad experience.one must stand up after a fall to continue the journey and i certainly i hope i can walk beside you in this journey
Saturday, June 25, 2005
blah blah blah
haih...life sucks...already spend two weeks in mlk.yea yea...i got new housemates...four of them in total and the one that stay next room to my room is damn terrible.first thing is he has tatoos..cool,huh?eeeewwwwwwwww...i hate tatoos guys...it makes them lower class.having the tatoo is not the main problem but his attitude..and guess what?last week,i dun where the hell he got little green frogs ( about 10 of them) and this kind of psycho put those frogs in an aquarium next to the toilet bowl.what the heck,man!where got people rear frogs in the toilet?i hate it when those small green creatures peeking me when i do my own bussiness especially when they have those big round eyes.damn that fella,early in the morning already make lots of noise.i hate it when people disturb my sleep.those kind of samseng like to on the music damn loud.is he deaf or what?f*** himlah!the others are ok i guess.maybe because they stays upstairslah.lots of things to catch up in studies.lecturers teaching like speeding bullet.as for my family,lots of problems occur.arguments ,slimming issue..all realted to my elder sis.my mum really worried about her and as for me,i am very dissapointed with her.the way she treat mum is really not right.i have no idea when she will change .mum said give her a chance and i have live with her for almost 20 years and know her too well..habits can never change.aaarrrgghhh..dun want to talk about herlah.as for jolly,i am proud of her.at last she manage to get first in the class but there is still room of improvement for her as she still havent reach the standard my elder sis and me have achieved...hehe.frens here are ok i guess...as usual,i dun social much.looking forward to go back ipoh.went to watch batman begins the other day with felicia ,great show!going for a movie reminds me of the day i went to watch kung fu mahjong with leo .miss him so much until i dream of him...ooooppppsss....did i give my blog link to him?cant remember...it wasnt a good dream though.i dream of losing him though i know i dun own him or anything but no matter what,losing a fren is the thing i fear the most especially those special ones.hmm....dun wanna talk about this now.change topic...hehe...aiks...its getting late...time to sleep....nitez!
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
new person in my life
fuiyoh,two months holiday passes like a blink of an eye.so fast..cant believe that.happy times passes damn fast and hard times passes damn slow.yup,a brand new sem.hmm..nah...i dun want to talk about new sem cos it only means studies.this holiday has been great for me and maybe it is the best ever!yaya,from my previous post,i did mention about how i suffer during holidays but then that time it was only the beginning of the holidays and at the end of it,i found that it was really an enjoying holiday and the most relaxing one ever!well,i went to genting highlands as you can in those pics i have posted,had a great time there with my family eventhough it was crowded and not to mention the amount the money i have spend!but never mind because my salary was bank into my account already.hehehe...and that explains why i belanja thean seng last tuesday.what to do?i have promised him and i dun like to broke a promise.yea,last tuesday was one of the happiest day of my life.nah...definitely not because of thean seng..hehe(aiks,thean seng,dun be angry if you read this)..well,i went out with my supervisor.we decided to watch movie and since we are going jj,so i went to ask thean seng to come along but thean seng not joining us to watch movie.oh yea,before the movie,lunch first of course.i ask leo to wait me at coffee bean and god knows where is thean seng until he told me he is at capcom.on the way to capcom,i suddenly heard someone callling my name.guess who?yup,it was leo.wow!i was surprised to see that he look great compare to those days when working,he hardly comb his hair and look messy and that day,he look really cute ( wink* wink*). i wanted to have lunch at pizza hut and we have lunch there.oh yea..as for thean seng,that fella damn tall. after lunch we went capcom.was kind of impressed when i saw thean seng play that drum machine,din know he was so damn good at it!we saw a little boy drop his tokens on the floor and he pick his tokens but there is one left,and leo pick it up and gave back to the boy..what a kind guy he is!as i know,he has three sisters and he treat them very well.i always like those kind hearted and caring guys.after some time,kind of bored at capcom so we decided to walk around and left thean seng there as he wants to be in capcom.at 3 pm,we went to the cinema and bought a popcorn and a drink each.we share the popcorn and the movie was great!when i told this to fern,she ask got anything happen in the cinema or not....hehe..(wink wink*) you figure it yourselflah...anyway,there were kind of disturbance during the movie as his phone keep on ringing.haih...after movie,he told me he has to leave.was kind of sad that time but then maybe luck kua,after less than 15 minutes he left me,he sms me telling me it was raining and he have to stay behind.hurray!hehehe...then we went walk around jusco and talk about a lot of things...went kfc for lunch( its as if he can read my mind..i wanted to have kfc dinner one....haha...he belanja of course.was really happy that time and it has been long since i have this kind of happy feeling.aiks...hand pain already...seeya
Monday, June 13, 2005
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