Words without pics

I found out that my blog lack of pics. This is because I kinda lazy to blog at home using my desktop where I keep all my pics. Use up my lunch time to blog with my laptop nowadays.Well, life has been ok so far. For Digizens, it is all about iphone- the coolest gadget in the century. Well, limit one set for one staff only. Hopefully, I can help to sell out one or else need to use my own money to own one at the staff price.Either one it is really worth it. Due to it is such a good bargain, one of my fren already approach me on this but too bad, I do want to own an Iphone or perhaps for my family.If you notice my facebook, my relationship status has been changed. haha...to do that, I need to get approval from "his" parents first. Meet the parents is ok but kinda awkward as we have some communication issue. I cant imagine of speaking Malay with his parents. It gaves some kind of "not close" feeling. Perhaps I will learn some hokkien and brush up my mandarin. Mlk trip was a good one although there was some last minute dissapointment caused by my mum and sis but it turned out to be fine.

Recently, I notice that I have been extremely lazy.In every way. I feel tired easily and need a lot of sleep. Is this a sign of aging? My plan to go for jogging has been a failure for a long long time with me unable to wake up early on Sunday morning. I dont even like to walk around my housing area.Perhaps got no company. Used to do that with my parents last time but unable to do it anymore with my mum's leg bad condition.It is really pitiful and sad when u see one of your family member having some problem with the leg. This is the reason each time i went back home, I tend to help out a bit with the housework. With my mum's leg condition, she unable to go travelling overseas and this has make her very very sad. Well, as daughter, what I can do is to bring her to travel in Malaysia that require less walking therefore I will organise a trip end of the year for her. Need to save money for that.Lunch time over, time to start work!

sat morning

Well, right now I am at Proton Service Centre waiting for my beloved darling serviced by some slow and inefficient technician.The reason why I said them in such a way as I always had bad experience each time I come here to service my darling. Although already made appointment, somehow when I took a quick glance at their car list, found that someone doesnt follow the time schedule. Well, in Malaysia, it has always been unfair. Priority given to the majority races. Heck,i do not want to end up in ISA hands. Faham faham saje lah.Damn hungry also as I din take breakfast. about the price of service, the guy did mention it almost reaching to two hundred bucks. No choice, pay with my credit card. Notice this so called Center of Excellence(Cose) tend to charge more. My fren mention it has standard prices but I Doubt that.The last time I service in Ipoh, it was so much cheaper. No choicelah, this is the nearest Proton service centre. Enough of about service and my darling car.

Life has been ok only as being sick for two consecutive days in a week definitely make my body weaker.Drinking of few bottles of bird nest doesnt help much also.The lazy worm has attacked me with all their might causing me to feel sleepy and lazy most of the time. Work efficiency has been deteriorating. Well, who cares? Since my job memang sucks. My team mate treat Dg as their father company. Half day for fewdays and missing for the rest of the days in the week. Talk about my manager on this, he just not bother.So, why should me,a lowest rank staff should care?
I care because thanks to this bunch of useless people, I have to do their job task. This is not the worse, the worse is my manager driving me crazy. Due to all the frustration, I cant take it so I no longer become the nice,polite girl who will just said "yesyes, I will do it, will settle it". No, I practically shout and yell and stare at my manager nowadays each time he came to me to ask this and that or ask me to settle someone's job. Dont want to give face or whatsoever.My dept is in the process of re organization but I dun really care. As if I got the chance to move to another section. Really depressed sometimes but life just have to go on.

Work isnt the end of my problem. There are many others but I think I better keep it to myself. My frens around me,thanks for being so patient and even my parents...thanks a lot...jo has been very grumpy but hope you guys all understand. If I keep everything to myself,I might gone nuts ..Really need your ear to ease the pain.

feeling a bit lost

just realize i have abandon my blog for a long time. more than a month. well, life is like a routine,not much changes from wake up, go work, off work, dinner, watch drama/rest and sleep. I getting sick of this kind of life. Although I am not so sure on the definition of quarter life crisis but I feel there is something wrong with my life. I start to act weird sometimes and I tend to be very forgetful. No, I am not getting lunatic but mind a bit disturbed nowadays. It is very dangerous to drive when your mind is not focus and I do know that but I cant just help it. I keep thinking and thinking. Well, the only place I will admit that I have high dignity is here and only here. i always want "face". It is normal, right? Just like the famous chinese phrase " trees want the skin, human wants face". Kindly translate the phrase into cantonese.If someone never invite me to a certain event, I wont be thick skin to tag along or force that person to invite. To me, it is pointless, u can lied to yourself but the truth hurts more if u think rationally. Wish to write more but time doesnt permit. My lunch time over and loads of work waiting for me.

Feb 2010

Yup, it has been a long time din update my blog. Those lazy worms start to attacking me already. I wonder sometimes what happen to my body as it seems that I always feel tired and restless till the extend I even woke up late this morning. There is something that is bothering my mind this whole week. Mood has been bad lately and I cant stop complaining this and that. This is not the way it is suppose to be but I just cant help it.Even treat my own boss in a very extreme harsh way. I am trying very hard to tell myself , relax, dun bother so much, dun care but I think I have failed to do. Seriously, I fail. I admit that. Notice ever since from uni days till now, there is always problem, challenges,one after another. Ask me on my happy moments, I do have, of course but due to my negative thinking now, the bad things has overshadow the good things.Yes, am looking forward to CNY but somehow the feeling is a bit different compare to the younger days of me. Yes, i dont like the feeling of growing up and getting older but no choice...My family has always been my first priorities especially my parents but my younger sis has always been the trouble creator and wonder when she will grow up.Keep telling myself that she is still young but each time I go back, her attitude really testing my patience.Well, to comfort myself, probably the year of ox is the year of "fan tai sui" is not over yet. There are so many things bothering my mind including my niece has the issue of "unable to speak" which kinda serious. Although she is not my kid, but I still worry. Yes, I keep worrying this and that.Bet thats the reason for the number of white hair I have right now. I cant stop worrying especially on those I love. When will I learn to put things behind and dont care so much? Am i asking too much and have high expectations?

bye bye 2009 and hello 2010

Yup, it is the end of year 2009 and new year 2010, new beginning for everything.It has been a year of sadness, dissapointment and happiness. When reflect back, health has been deteriorating and it wasnt a really good year for those born in the year of the ox. I am getting old so I cant remember every single event that happens in 2009 but those significant ones were car accident after less than a week driving new car and of course, watching foreworks on new year eve. Fyi, I have a special liking to watch fireworks and it has been a long time I watch fireworks in such a short distance. Besides that, it is about me being aunty again (yes, it is my beloved nephew).Enough of 2009 and lets talk about what is the resolution for 2010. Last night, someone told me I want to get married this year but it is not true. Got no such intention to settle down yet. Well, I dare not dream far as the higher your hopes are, the harder it is to achieve and will fall really hard if fail. In summary, hopefully, I will earn more money and money and money this year. Career-no hope already. Stagnant , freeze...Love life...so far, it has been great..hopefully it stays this way, i want good luck also in all my undertakings, last but not least, please give me good health.Not only to me, but my parents as well. Abit sleepie due to lack of sleep last night....Nitez

Christmas!

Kindly take note the pics is to cheer everything up.

depressed

Just when I think that everything is going to be ok, things start to get worse. Timing not right somemore, mum undergoing cataract operation, nephew admitted to hospital and I cant bother my family on my problems.Not really problem but my sadness and dissatisfication . As usual, I tried to comfort myself by telling that I am lucky compare to those contract not extended. I do not need to go for probation period.Haih...Well, I have to admit, I should be thankful. Got secured job now, salary although little but still can survive, family and frens that really care about me and there whenever I need them. Need to relax! Dun think so much, jo, just let it go!Will be going back hometown this Thursday...Cant wait!

its going to be end of 2009 soon

Yup, it is already Dec 2009 and time to reflect back what has been done this year. Luck was not on me this year especially from starting of the year till my birthday. So many misfortune events happen.Perhaps we will think of what we have achieved this year. Basically in terms of work, not much achievement for me in terms of technical knowledge. I am still extreme lagging behind compare to other tele engineers out there. Been working for one year plus and I feel myself still like a fresh grad only. Besides work, family....lots of arguements throughout the year especially with my younger sis. Perhaps the way I handle things is still not matured enough causing all this arguments. In terms of frens, I think still ok. Social life not that good....anti social mah....I got to know a lot of new frens too this year compare back to my uni days.Well, another two weeks plus will be christmas.Well,my christmas present budget will be cut cut cut down this year. Last year, I overspend a bit and this year, presents are only for closed ones. Frens will be out of the list. Nyek Nyek, thats why I got extra money to buy a new Reebok shoe plus some cosmetics.Bought a cake mixer for my mum and she is extreme happy about it. Ok, lets go to my wish list and see there is any changes. Will update my resolution for year 2010 soon

Wish list
1. change HP(wanna buy Samsung brand one)- Er, I think I will be getting my RM1000 mobile voucher next year...)
2. decorate my Ipoh room- my younger sis finally clean the room so I just need to decorate it a bit, previously, was freaking messy
3. a raise in my salary(damn low, work like hell only)-still waiting
4. more bonus(again,it is money)- got my quarterly bonus....
5. wanna see my niece(wai yan) more often- she still very far away
6. a better job and company..- cant find...:(
7. to own a house - long term dream which I dun think I can achieve even in 2010
8. money again to buy amanah saham malaysia so that I can make profit- still not enough yet and no more amanah saham release now....
9. last but not least...a good husband(haha, aiyoh, no bf already wish husband...kengleh)-er..uncertain on this

my beloved niece

thats my beloved niece, wai yan. although naughty a bit, i still love her a lot. wish to blog more but lazy and sleepy liao

Birthday 2009

Wow, how time flies. Yea, i am 24 years old already. I feel myself still young compare to others,he he. This year birthday , not a very good one.The pre birthday celebration in ipoh din really went that well due to some reasons.Was planning to have a nice dinner with my whole family but ended up,it was cancel. Initially, I was also planning to wear a nice dress also to take pics. Due to no mood already, ended up, I was wearing T- SHIRT only when I cut cake. I not going to talk about the bad things that happen here.One of the special thing this year is the cake, unlike the usual years, I normally will have a liking to chocolate cakes only but this year, my daddy manage to find a tiramisu cake for me.Thanks , daddy!
As for the presents, not much this year. Got a scarf from my elder sis(she cut my birthday budget already..haih). In summary, pics tell everything.He he...

life is like a stage...we are all actors and actress

refer to title above, thats what i feel about life. currently, i am living in a state of denial. When i feel scared, i keep telling those around me that I am ok.when I found that I miss someone, I told myself that I just being too lonely, when I am worried, I try to comfort myself that things will be better soon. Yes, I found myself a bit pathetic. There are so many things i keep to myself just to make sure the other party doesnt get hurt.Deep inside, I really want to voice everything out but the reality prohibit me from doing that. Ended up, I wrote here. This blog is just a way for me to rant here about everything.Music is my life and so is this blog.I feel tired of mentioning about my work here as it is getting duller and less interesting day by day. I lost my passion in working. The reason I work is because of money and to survive.thats all...

Ok, what I want to mention here is about kids. They are pretty troublesome. Well, lots of people got the concept" i like kids" as most of the kids love me and like me around. Yes, I do like kids for short time. Not long period by taking care of them for more than 1 week.My concept is "dun want to have much kids...most is 2..." That also if I got married only. Dun want to become "yellow lady". Kids are money sucker( like me lah).Leech that never want to leave you.

Oh yea, my dog was pretty sick last week. I seriously thought that he will leave me. It is really sad to see someone/something that you love left you. I felt this kind of pain six years ago and I hate to go through that again. Well, my dog pretty old and it is time to go soon. Took leave and told myself "if got fate, he will wait till i back home". i pray to god too as he is the last person that you can come to when other things doesnt help at all. I thank god for hearing my prayers as my dog was getting well after that.Thank you , for giving me more time with scottie. oOPSS...its getting late. Need to sleep soon as tomorrow will be another busy day!

Moven peak, RPGC

Yes, this is my latest hair style...A bit weird at the front...Wish my hair can grow longer.

new member of the family again!

Yes, I got a nephew on 11 Sept 2009. His name is Leong Wai Lik, but I prefer to call him Jordan.Like all babies, he love to cry and shit a lot. Most of the time, he will sleep only. Super cute( like his auntie mah...)Due I scared my cam's flash will hurt his eyes, therefore I just manage to snap pic of him when he sleeps.

work

short post ....seriously heavy loaded with work. Wonder when I will be so free in the office till I got nothing to do?Never...either I delay my work, there is always so much work. Haih...I hate working life.

the past, the present and the future

Well, finally i have time to blog.I am back from PD-MLK trip. In short, I had a great weekend.This blog of mine is the place where I will be myself and speak whatsoever inside my heart. how old am i?Soon to be 24 but looking back, I have gone through a lot. From happiness, my darkest part...shame...sadness...heartbroken.Yes, I think I have grown a lot. I no longer the small kid I used to be, the one that always play in Ipoh Garden East playground, refuse to study till my mum beat me up or the one that ran away from home, I have changed from being a cheerful, friendly kid into someone who keep quiet all the time with a lot of things to think about. I miss my childhood times but time will never stop ticking.Yes, some of you might call me a "freak" also as I am someone who always put a sour face and not friendly.Have you ever lost someone? Lost as if u no longer can see that person or no longer frens with that fella. Being a "freak", I have go through that.If you notice in my blog, I sort of having a virtual war with another blogger till I stop everything. This blogger is not that important to me so the impact to me is minor but I did lost a fren before. It is not because we have argument, it is because of other reason. I have lost in touch with this person which I hope I can see him someday , that also if I can still recognise him.One of my happiest time is all my fellow frens being together, spend time at shopping mall, watch movies in cinema...no worries . This frens of mine , I manage to keep in touch with some of them but things will never be the same. Another significant fren of mine which I mention here many times liao, I have a dream on "you". You were so happy and you told me that. It was such a wonderful dream that I woke up laughing to myself. This fren of mine is very important to me and he has gone through a lot. When u really care on someone, u only wish him to be happy and I really happy for him for living happily now and put down the past.Well, that is only 20% of my past, the present for now. What hurt the most is the one you care and love treat you the same way as others. The pain is really unbearable but perhaps i am really stupid. Each time, I just told myself, that person is different ....lying to myself. sometimes, my feelings cover up my rational thinking.I got so confused sometimes. a lot of people telling me that it is time to let go.I tried to...but it is really hard. The last time I have this kind of scenerio, it took me 3 years...ok, enough.The future...yes, i am going for an interview next Friday.I need to gain more experience in interview so just want to try out. Slim chance for the company to hire me but I wanna overcome my interview fear.Yes, i always nervous and forgot everything each time I go for interview for job. I admit I am useless in this. Hopefully, this will help me. My future in my current company is undecided. Not sure how is my career path and I kind of lost. My parents is very encouraging type and support me whatever I do. A lot of people look down on me, I dont blame them as I ,myself feel I am useless but I wont give up. I still young,still got time to learn...

PD-MLK Trip soon!

Well, it is lunch time now so I think I will use up some time to blog here. Eh, dun get wrong that I using office hours woh, lunch time, I am free to do whatever I like. Nope, I wont feel guilty at all as I have dedicated and committed to my job. I work till 730 pm yesterday to do my partner's work, Yes, you heard it right, it is not even my task and yet I still do as this is teamwork.There will never be a hour where I am free and have nothing to do(yea, i am that busy). Most of the time,I multitasking. Enough of work!Kindly refer to my title, I am going to PD this sat,hooray!Of course with the ones I love the most . Due to PD,not much stuff, we decide to pay a visit to the historical city on Sunday. Yes, this historical city is none other than MALACCA ,the place I have stay for five years(really a long time).FYI,I will be the one organising the agenda of this trip and also the driver(yes,it is me me me....it is time for a filial daughter to bring her mummy and daddy and my beloved sis around mlk)I am so going to look forward to this trip. Best thing is I even took leave on Monday as I will only back to KL on Monday.Away from work, spending time with loved ones, what more is better? I need a break from work, yes, i do..as work is do damn stressful with annoying account manager chasing after u, or e mails from SMC, or your manager chasing you to help him do something..sien...I have tied up my room a bit, it looks neat and tidy and very cosy for me.Sad thing, my room in Ipoh is in a mess thanks to my younger sis( I feel like strangle her when i think of this). I want to decorate my room also hard. Ended up, it is kind of dusty too as six years I have left my home..till now, it is true i always go home but I seldom go inside my room also.Yes, u are right, I will sleep in my parent's room. Different bed of course. Btw, I would like to update my wish list here.


Wish list
1. change HP(wanna buy Samsung brand one)
2. decorate my Ipoh room
3. a raise in my salary(damn low, work like hell only)
4. more bonus(again,it is money)
5. wanna see my niece(wai yan) more often
6. a better job and company..
7. to own a house
8. money again to buy amanah saham malaysia so that I can make profit
9. last but not least...a good husband(haha, aiyoh, no bf already wish husband...kengleh)


Already fulfill wish list
1. Bought new car(yes, it is my darling Persona)
2. New camera with 12 megapixel
3. Laptop( company's one is enough loh)
4. Air cond room so that I wont feel hot compare to student's life
5. Frens that is nearby and can keep in touch
6. A pink Nike shoe(finally own one)
7. A pink branded watch(bought Elle)
8. A pink bag ( Elle Active sling bag)

Smiley

Yup, as what the title says, I have changed my hamster's name from "willy" to "smiley" since end of March till now.I suppose to upload a lot of pics here of smiley and also my darling ,persona but seriously, I dont have time. Yes, time is never enough. Always busy with work nowadays and no time to update blog also. I changed my hamster's name as from the day smiley step into my home( yes, it is home means my ipoh houselar...it is my only home), my dad keep on calling him smiley but after a while, I decided to call him "smiley" and he likes that name too. He is one very naughty hamster.Only like to eat "kuaci", others dun want. Always wasteful so I got no choice but starve him a bit.He he. Active at night and likes to bathe.Yes, he has a bath tube with the sand and he likes to lie down on his bath tub. Oklah, enough of smiley.
Work piling up as usual. Not going to elaborate as I not that happy with my job scope but needs money, so no choice. Went back home two weeks ago and this time, I bought a nice cloth and ask the tailor to help me make a evening gown(short length) this time for my "not so formal" wedding/event to attend. Yes, I got no choice but to ask tailor to make for me as I am very short and fat. Hard to buy one that can fit me perfectly. Some fits but I look like humpty dumpty. Life has been great. I met my exschoolmates and had a great time last Friday. Went swimming on Sunday. What I like the most is being able to do things that I enjoy!

At Nadiah's wedding with frens

A day with my beloved family...

Me and my mummy
Me and daddy

one of the down part of my life

Well, unlucky for me and being careless,less than a week driving my new car, i was involve in accident.so many unfortunate things happen.luckily, my relative help me by borrowing his car to me to go to work while my car remain in the workshop for few days. haih, life was like hell, i keep blaming myself, my beloved parents din scold me causing me to feel extremely guilty. I have no idea how much I have cried that week.I know some of you might say I am childish but I cant hold back my tears. On sunday night, i keep recalling the accident.On Monday, I was like zombie, luckily I got training that day.Anyway,thank god everything is ok now but my budget for this months has become extremely tight. Well, there are so many things happen,I not going to mention it here but seriously, I felt really hurt. Hurt by someone who hardly cares for me,someone will only come to me when he needs help. Yes, right now, I can even tell I have confused my feelings with the truth. The truth is this person never care for me, each time, I was overshadow by my own feelings,telling myself that he is a good person. I cant have everything in life. I start to count my blessings, new car, my house is very new, a very beautiful room with my own bathroom,a job and a family that cares me a lot. I am very fortunate compare to other people. My colleague said "I live in my own world"(due to I put on my earphones all the time). I dont see anything wrong, most importantly, it doesnt affect my performance. My social life in work might be less but at least I in good terms with everyone, I do not need to stick with one group all the time. Most importantly, I am happy,that is all matters,right? I kind of miss my daddy and mummy,taking one day leave to visit them this weekend.Cant wait to spend time with my family,nothings matters anymore than my family....